Gay confession-Straight guy with Gay tendencies

Okay I have never had sex with a male, and have dated lots of women, and I like women, and I like sex with women. However, I really want to try sex with a man, I want to be able to feel a penis in and around my mouth… I have shown myself to guys online with cams a lot of times, and have almost solicited myself on few sites… but that would be too much I think. I still think that sex with a man would be great. Its just that I’m too afraid to go about actually doing it.